Possibly inappropriate

for me to be saying this.

But my heart is terribly bored, and empty.
Not in the usual cold, heartless and indifferent way, but in the "Man, I wish I had a crush on someone so I can actually feel some semblance of humanity; femininity related with it within me" kind of way.

You know, that feeling that comes with liking someone out of your reach - a completely one-sided interest?
Or just that act or feeling of liking and missing someone of the opposite sex?
That's missing. And my heart misses that... pain. That whole longing deal.
hahahahaaaaaaaa, masochistic much?

I know this sounds crazy. Because it's usually a good thing to be so carefree, yes?

Truth be told, my heart has been liberated (to the max!) after the superbly long-winded chapter on Quek and myself got its' closure. And I am happy, of course. Unfortunately, it also left a gaping hole. One that I still do not know how to mend because the hurt; hope & sad longing have always been there to fill it. Now that that's gone, there's just emptiness left.

I still love my independence and freedom and am in no way ready or in a rush to get myself into a committed relationship. It's just that despite how busy and/or fulfilled I am with work, working out, random activities, friends or life in general...There's just nothing to ......feel. in that particular department.

I guess the conclusion is this:
Heart be bored. Needs some spark. Miss the chase. Ready to feel again.

I think in order to do that, I may need to go out and meet new people.
BUT. PLEASE LUH. WHERE GOT TIME? LOL.
Not a big priority in my life now either.

Hence...This is a "I'm just saying....." kind of post. #TEEHEEEEE