And

sometimes, i'm clinging onto the past, feeling insecure because i'm afraid of change.
maybe it's also because i have become too dependent, too used to routine, too close???

I know it's natural to miss the good ol' days.

To want everything nice to last longer, last as long as possible.

The mind just loves living in the past. At least mine does.

Feelings of nostalgia, warmth, familiarity. They're pretty nice.
Mixed feelings at times, but mostly positive.

Life has been good, in fact, it's been great!

But different. It sure feels different.

And I am adapting, but still, a little worried?

These particular feelings have been popping up pretty often in my lifetime.

Why is that so...

What exactly do i want?

I eventually get over it, but the outcome has never been pleasant.
Everything slowly disappears because i just let go. Just 'move on'.

I suppose i'm projecting that fear once again.

The sad thing is, I don't know when to hold on, and when to let go.
I've not learnt. And I don't know what to do.

I. don't. like. or want to be. clingy. dependent. desperate. suffocating.

That is utterly disgusting. And that is why i usually let go.

And i lose wonderful people just like that.

BUT the biggest question is, holy shit -

What am/was i expecting from all of them?

o_o

Is there a way to deal with this fear?

whoaaaaa.
sudden burst of brainfarts at a weird time once again tee hee.

Other than that, I am thankful for my wonderful day! :D